In Lieu

Read about my wonderful parenting skills.

Nips!

It finally happened last night as some of you warned. I got chaffed nipples. (Bring on the web search hits!) On Wednesday's I usually run with a guy I work with and we had 10 miles scheduled. It was pouring rain, but we're both too competitive to back down and we did it anyway. Apparently the fomula for chaffed nipples is a wet shirt and 10 miles. They fucking hurt. I can't imagine what it would be like to breast feed out of these babies.

In other disgusting running news I ripped off a toenail last night. I got new sneakers 9 weeks ago and on my second time out with them I over did it on the treadmill and one toenail turned black. About two weeks ago it started to peel away from the base and I could just feel that horrible toenail monster hanging out under there with all his friend drinking mini beers and picking up one-legged hookers. Last night during Lost I decided to just rip it off. mmmmm.... you gotta love running!

Nothing much

It's time for a new car in the O'Household. We've both got cars that are six years old now. My civic will probably last another 10 years, so Kym's QX4 will be traded in for another SUV which will be kid-friendly. We're thinking a Honda Pilot. What do you think? Any suggestions?

I lost my wedding ring somewhere between my race on Sunday and my softball game on Monday. So, I guess that means I'm single again.

189 miles run Since January 29th. 10 miles after work today. Then just 21 more before my 10 miler next Sunday. Then what? Probably a beer gut.

Five weeks from now Kenslee will be 1. That's just crazy.

Before work this morning I put weed and feed on my lawn. I was considering dedicating an entire post to how much weeds gross me out. But, I couldn't come up with the right words to express my disgust.

One Down

Yesterday I ran in the first of the two races I signed up for. It was a 5 mile race in Valley Forge Park. Valley Forge is a historical park where battles in the revolutionary war took place. It's really hilly and was probably a great place to fight a good old fashioned war with those cannons on wheels and muskets and funny looking hats. It's not a great place to run. It's beautiful, and they never cleaned up the dead bodies, so it's fun to have to jump over those, but hills are tough when you're not used to them. I wanted to lie down and take a nap halfway through the race. But, I didn't. And I finished strong and averaged 7:18 miles and I'm ready for the 10 Miler in two weeks now. The End.

PS. What's with the surge of traffic to my site of people looking for naked pictures of Brad Pitt?

My thoughts

OK, so what happened at VTech on Monday was one of the worst things ever. It was probably one of the most despicable acts coordinated by a single human being ever. Here's my list:

1. Hilter killing all the Jews
2. September 11
3. Jonestown massacre
4. Oklahoma bombing
5. VTech killings
6. "Nappy headed ho's"

My heart and prayers go out to everyone affected by this.

So, here comes my complaint... Can we not remember this by the date? I'm starting to see murmurs of "Remember 4-16-07". Can we not ruin another day of the year by referring to a tragedy simply by the date. I'm sure there are thousands of Americans who were born on September 11th in any year and their birthdays are now ruined. Can we not let this tragedy be known as 4-16? We only have 365 days in a year and 366 on leap years. Can we not have them all referred to by the tragedy that happened that day?

Except February 29th. No one really cares about that day.

A point not well made

So yesterday on the way home from work I stopped at the store and picked up 12 pack of pepsi. Regularly priced at $4.99, I got it on sale for $3.50. After getting home and getting scolded for not getting a good enough sale price I proceeded to have some Lucky Charms for dinner.

I'm upset about the events of yesterday

My wife and I get along pretty well. I'm an average husband and I feel I'm an above average dad. I don't think she has too much to complain about. She's above average at just about everything so I don't have much too complain about either. We never fight.

But yesterday I got angry at her. She worked from home and went grocery shopping at lunch. When she got home she put the cold stuff away and left the rest in the car for me to unload. I had no problem lifting the several cases of water and the 10 other bags of food in the house. But the contents of the last bag struck a nerve. It was two boxes of Lucky Charms. Lucky Charms are definitely in my top 5 favorite cereals, so you'd think I'd be happy about that. But, as I went to put the cereal away I counted. These two boxes brought our running total of cereal boxes to 21. We have TWENTY-ONE boxes of cereal in our panty. For two of us. Disgusted by this gluttony I went to put away the two boxes of brownie mix she bought. And that brought our brownie mix total to 7 boxes. We eat cereal twice a week probably. I don't know that we've made brownies twice since we've been married. But, like a typical female, she can't pass up a good deal. I don't care if they paid her to take this stuff, it's ridiculous.

With dinner every night I like to have a can of Caffeine Free Pepsi. I like to drink one can every single night. I haven't had a can in approximately 4 weeks now because the sale prices have not been good enough. I can't have something I drink everyday, but we have enough brownie mix to last us until we retire. Desperate times call for desperate measures so today I'm going to go to the grocery store and pay full price for a 12 pack of soda. I'm sure the divorce papers will be on the kitchen table in the morning.

Blogger's Block

I think it's a fairly common thing for a blogger to be lying in bed and think of a good post to write the next day. Then, usually they wake up and realize it wasn't a good idea at all. I have so little to write these days that last night I was lying in bed and thought of something to write. But, even in my half awake state I realized it was a horrible topic to write about but I decided I'd write about it anyway.

I forget what that topic was now.

My little carnivore

About a week a ago we took Kenslee to her first steak house.

Where she contemplated eating a steak...


Then went for it...


Just like daddy does it.

Week End

A guy I work with just bought a house and there was a swingset in the backyard he offered to me. So, Saturday morning my father-in-law and I spent 2 hours taking it apart and brought it over to my house. After about 3 hours of putting it back together we realized the wood was warped and not stable enough to last more than another year or two. Anyone want a swingset?

My first week's fantasy baseball score: 336-221. A 115 point victory. The next closest person in the league to me was 97 points behind. I love myself.

Friday night we held a practice Easter Egg Hunt for Kenslee. She learned the ropes then kicked some ass on Sunday.

When I became a dad one of the things I looked forward to was coming home from work and having my daughter run to the door to greet me with a hug. I didn't think it would be happening at 10 months. Now that she's walking she'll spot me across the room and run over to me with her arms outstreched for a big hug. It's the awesomest.

Just like the fountain of youth

Tonight we went to the Trappe. It's the local college bar in my town. It made me feel just like I was 21 again. Just like a 21 year old who's back gets tired after standing for ten minutes, complains about how loud and shitty the band is, then has to leave at 11:00 to get home for the babysitter. I feel so alive!

Fruit

Salad

UGGGH!

Almost 24 hours with a post without commentability. Such torture. Doing that is like pulling all your teeth out before you go the the dentist just to make a joke. Painful and unrewarding. But still amusing.

Comments Welcomed Here!

I've been blogging for two and a half years now. When I started blogging I probably would have quit if a few nice people didn't comment on my first few posts. If I remember correctly, I was even happy when I'd get a commenter trying to get me to win a free ipod or to try to enlarge my penis. Hey, everyone like free ipods and enlarged penii, right?

But, I can definitely understand that some people get sick of the spam comments and either enable comment moderation or make people type in a password. Me? I don't give a shit. I'll like all comments. Good or bad, real or spam, funny or poor attempts at trying to be funny.

So, what I don't understand is people that turn off their comments. Oh, what, are you just writing for yourself? Bullshit. Everyone writes to be read. Everyone wants to hear people laugh or criticize what you say. That's the only reason to blog. I think people, such as Dooce, who don't allow comments are pompous. Jerkoffs. I don't read Redacted as much as I used to because he no longer allows comments. That's just annoying. Right?

It's the testosterone talking

In the words of the great Michael Conti, for the (n)one of you that care, yesterday was the start of the baseball season and the first of many Phillies late leads lost.

It was also the start to my championship fantasy baseball season. If my memory serves me correctly it was the second greatest single day performance in the 5 years I've been playing fantasy baseball. (Second only to the day Randy Johnson pitched a perfect game)

14 teams, head to head format.

C - R. Martin - 0-4
1 - L. Overbay - 2-4, 1B, 2B, RBI, R, BB
2 - O. Hudson - 3-4, 2 1B, 2B, 2 RB1, 2 R
SS - H Ramirez - 4-6, 2 1B, 2 2B, RBI, 4 R, 2 SB
3 - M Cabrera - 3-4, 1B, 2B, HR, 4 RBI, R, 2 BB
OF - P. Burrell - 1-4, 1B, R, BB
OF - A. Dunn - 2-4, 2 HR, 3 RBI, 2 R, BB
OF G. Sizemore - 2-4, 1B, HR, RBI, 3 R, BB
DH A. Kearns - 1-4 1B, R
Angels - 8K, W, S

For a ridiculous bottom line of:

.474 18-38, 9 1B, 5 2B, 4 HR, 12 RBI, 15 R, 2 SB, 6 BB
9 INN, 5 HA, 5 BBI, 8 K, W, S

I'm great!

Do Re MeMe

Since I recently discovered I have complete musical influence over the internet I figured I'd do the latest meme going around.

ne me quitte pas - Regina Spektor - This could be the most headache/Vomit inducing video on youtube. Whoever designed that set should be hung. But, the Ne Me Quitte Pas pool is shallow.



lollipop - Mika - I'm pretty sure that by putting this on here it makes me at least partially gay.



rehab - Amy Winehouse - There were three Winehouse songs I wanted to put on this, but this the performance from Letterman that Kenslee and I watch together at least once a day. It puts the biggest smile on her face every morning.



alfie - Lily Allen - This song comes on about 45 minutes into my running playlist and always peps me up




dashboard - modest mouse -I'd never seen this video until I just searched for it. It like it. It reminds me of my new favorite tv show, Deadiest Catch.



merry happy - Kate Nash - No explanations here. I just like this song.



jenny owen youngs - Fuck Was I - Pure, unadulterated Perez Hilton referral.

Sometimes...

Sometimes I'll write something that isn't all that funny or interesting, but it will end up with 20 comments because I'm simply too lazy to write anything else and that post just sits there for days. I wonder how long I'll have to keep this post up to get 50 comments...

A quick run to Baltimore, now back

Eight weeks ago I printed out a 14 week schedule to train for the Broad Street Run on May 6th. The total mileage on the training plan is 246 miles. In the past 8 weeks I've only missed one run, of 5 miles. Today marks the halfway point. 121 miles down, 120 miles to go. One would assume that when someone runs 121 miles in less than 8 weeks they've probably lost a good deal of weight. In the past 8 weeks I've lost 5 pounds. I lost them all when I got sick and missed that 5 mile run. I never regained all of the 9 pounds I lost when I was sick.

When I ran my first 2 mile run I looked at my schedule ahead and I shook my head and mentally berated myself up for starting something so stupid such as running 246 miles in 14 weeks. Now that I'm halfway there and I'm running 8 and 9 miles at a time, several times a week, I'm feeling better about starting this up. I'm not in too much pain, I feel strong, I feel healthy and I'm looking forward to the next 120 miles. And while I feel great, I'm not losing weight. If you want to feel great, run. If you want to lose weight stick your finger down your throat. I hear bulimia works wonders on the scale.

She's a Wino

About two weeks ago Amy Winehouse was on Letterman. I tivo'd it and was watching it one day when Kenslee was in the room. It mezmorized her more than Elmo does. She'll come from another room to watch Elmo, but loses interest after a few minutes. I can play this song over and over and she never takes her eyes off the tv. It's crazy.



If this works, thanks to Jacob. I never even noticed the "embed code" on youtube.

Two questions and an insincere comment

Question: Can anyone tell me how to imbed a youtube clip into a post?

Question: I turned it on at the last minute... what the hell was wrong with that sobbing little girl on American Idol last night? I was embarrassed for her.

Insincere comment: Am I the only one who doesn't feel bad/sorry/happy for the lost boy scout? For some unexplainable reason he reminds me of the runaway bride.