Monday, November 20, 2006

Masterpiece Theaters

Friday night we went to the local Pub, ate dinner, then rented a movie. Got home, put the baby to bed* and sat back to watch the first masterpiece of the weekend. John Tucker Must Die. When you put the JTMD dvd in you are prompted for "Theatrical Version" or "Unrated Version". I wonder if in the history of men anyone who has ever been presented this choice has chosen Theatrical Version. Being a bad comedy I knew that the choice was actually "Theatrical Version" or "Theatrical version with one added scene of completely unnecessary nudity". My wife fell asleep within 10 minutes and I toughed it out waiting for the boob shot. 90 minutes later, there were no boobs and no curse words that I can remember. Worst Unrated Version ever. On my A to Z scale of movie grading I give it somewhere between a U and a V.

Saturday was much of the same. This time it was The Break Up. I heard Jennifer Aniston showed her booty in this movie, so I knew I wouldn't be let down. (Yes, nudity is the only reason to rent comedies these days). But, of course I was disappointed with only a blurry image of what may or may not have been her ass. I actually giggled once or twice during this movie. I give it a K+.
Sunday I went to the worst football game ever.

This week. Only 3 days! Does anyone know if there's nudity in Accepted? I figure there has to be.

*I don't think I have mentioned this yet. The baby started talking last week. She's saying "Dad". Well, "Da." And she seems to have a 3 "Da" per week limit. She said it 3 times last Sunday, then not again until saying it 3 times yesterday morning. I dare you not to tear up a little when your daughter says "Da" for the first time. Bet you a dollar you can't do it.

Edit! The Daily Dump is Back! You see all you quitters. It's ok to come back!


Melissa said...

I've been wanting to see JTMD but haven't gotten around to renting it.Good thing, I don't wanna waste $4.As for Kenslee speaking, super cute. Let me know when she says Melissa for the first time.

Tim said...

well, she says "slut". That's the same thing, right?

❉ pixie ❉ said...

Only 2 days of work for me!

I don't know about Accepted, but there is some nudity in Over the Hedge—and it's funny to boot.

Why is Kenslee growing up so fast?

Tim said...

pix - totally. As awesome as it is to see her learning to sit on her own and talk and everything new she does on what seems to be a daily basis, I want her to be back to what she was 5 months ago when all she did was cuddle.

Sleeping through the night on the other hand is something new I'd kill to have. This morning she woke up at 4:45. I was trying to get her to fall back asleep (never happened) and she had her head buried in my neck. She started giving me rasberries. I've seen her do it to her hand a few times but it was the first time she did it to me. I got less than 5 hours of sleep and she was cracking me up because she was being so cute.

Leezer said...

Here is is only 7:11 a.m. in Seattle and you've already posted?

The Breakup was depressing. I hate breakup movies where they actually stay broken up, even IF they are about to kill each other. I can't figure out how anyone would ever break up with Vince Vaughn, but that's just me.

As for nudity, go rent "Kentucky Fried Movie." It was made in - like 1978. It's a bunch of little vignettes, and the first one is a shower scene with huge boobs squishing up against the glass shower door. The rest of the movie is pretty funny, in a retro-seventies sort of way.

As for Kenslee talking, I can't wait for the first time she tells you she loves you. That's just the best day ever. Does she do that thing when you're making funny faces or noises and she looks at you like, "WTF?" That look always cracked me up.

Tim said...

When I was about 10 years old I watched Kentucky Fried Movie at my older brother's friend's house. I had a boner for a week.

Brookelina said...

Yay for da!

I rented movies all weekend too. I was actually just thinking that I watched so many that coming back to reality has been difficult. hmmm....I sense a new blog post. Thank you.

Think Frustrated said...

Just wait until you come home from work, and she runs to you, arms open, screaming "Die-Dee" (say it out loud to get the full baby-talk version of Daddy), and then proceedes to give you a big hug and a kiss. The tension of the day just wears off after that.

I've heard that "Good Will Humping" and "Debbie Does Dallas" have a little bit of nudie boobies in them. You'll find them at your local privately owned video store in the section marked "Adult." Are you familiar with this? Boobies for adults only.

fuzzymuffin said...

I forgot what I was going to say after Jacob's comment went from babies to porn so easily.

Oh great One said...

The break up was such a let down. Sorry you had to waste your time.

As for your baby, you have so many teary moments coming up. My daughter is 10 now and it's still happening!

Beechball * said...

Congrats on the "Da" - I hope she soon figures out the whole word! You should try to catch that one on video, so super cute!

Tim said...

brooke - still waiting for that post...

tf - I can't wait for that. There's a little girl at daycare who only knows how to say dada at this point. When her mom walks in she screams "dada!". I'm sure that doesn't have quite the same effect for that mom.

fm - he changed water to wine (really cheap wine) so smoothly.

ogo - yeah, I imagine I'll never get over her awesomeness.

lb - It'll be really hard. She's a total camera whore. Every time we take out the camera she just stares and smiles.

Thomas Crymes said...

I agree. If I am watching an unrated movie, I'm expecting some nudity (maybe even full frontal) or some vile act that will make Tom Green (is he still alive?) convulse.

If I get neither of those, I suspect I will probably light something on fire.

Oh, and Kentucky Fried Movie is a great slapstick movie. The nude part is called Catholic High School Girls in Trouble. I don't think you need any more of a description than that.

btw. Nice blog.