Tuesday, April 17, 2007

I'm upset about the events of yesterday

My wife and I get along pretty well. I'm an average husband and I feel I'm an above average dad. I don't think she has too much to complain about. She's above average at just about everything so I don't have much too complain about either. We never fight.

But yesterday I got angry at her. She worked from home and went grocery shopping at lunch. When she got home she put the cold stuff away and left the rest in the car for me to unload. I had no problem lifting the several cases of water and the 10 other bags of food in the house. But the contents of the last bag struck a nerve. It was two boxes of Lucky Charms. Lucky Charms are definitely in my top 5 favorite cereals, so you'd think I'd be happy about that. But, as I went to put the cereal away I counted. These two boxes brought our running total of cereal boxes to 21. We have TWENTY-ONE boxes of cereal in our panty. For two of us. Disgusted by this gluttony I went to put away the two boxes of brownie mix she bought. And that brought our brownie mix total to 7 boxes. We eat cereal twice a week probably. I don't know that we've made brownies twice since we've been married. But, like a typical female, she can't pass up a good deal. I don't care if they paid her to take this stuff, it's ridiculous.

With dinner every night I like to have a can of Caffeine Free Pepsi. I like to drink one can every single night. I haven't had a can in approximately 4 weeks now because the sale prices have not been good enough. I can't have something I drink everyday, but we have enough brownie mix to last us until we retire. Desperate times call for desperate measures so today I'm going to go to the grocery store and pay full price for a 12 pack of soda. I'm sure the divorce papers will be on the kitchen table in the morning.

15 comments:

Oh great One said...

If that is the worst of your problems you are a lucky man! Enjoy your soda!

Laurie said...

I totally agree with OGO. If that's the worst of it then count your blessings. At least she thinks about you enough to still buy your Lucky Charms!

Tim said...

ogo - oh, I'll enjoy my soda. It will be all I'll have left after the divorce.
laurie - We already had 2 other boxes of them! It's excessive. Admit it!

Melissa said...

I appreciate that you even know what's in your pantry. James will occasionally go to the grocery store and come back with the most random things like a can of corn (we never even eat canned anything) and five tomatoes, completely ignoring the fact that I already have plenty of tomatoes in the veggie basket. But seriously, 21 boxes of cereal? Are you married to Jerry Seinfeld?

Jeni Angel said...

Oh geez! The retard I live with does this.

In fact, it's gotten to the point that I won't let him go to the grocery store with me.

I'm sorry, but I do not need 20 frozen dinners when he doesn't even LIKE frozen dinners.

Anonymous said...

I do this too Tim. It is funnier when I read about someone else doing it. I only buy stuff on sale, even if it is shitty or we don't need.

You helped me see the light. And I thank you for that. ;)

This is Naynayfazz by the way. I am having trouble logging into Blogger to comment. WTF?!

Jootastic said...

I buy random stuff too, but I'm laughing because you have 21 boxes of cereal in your "panty."

dizzy von damn! said...

tim has panties. :P

i buy things when they're on sale if i know i'll use them, but i also buy them when they're not if i need them.
or if they're shiny.

Christina said...

I do the exact same thing. This is why we have 14 boxes of rotelle pasta in our pantry right now, and 6 giant bottles of bleach sitting on the dryer. On sale!

Tim said...

mel - no. Seinfeld had variety. We have 5 boxes of lucky charms, 4 boxes of Life, 4 boxes of cheerios, 4 boxes of reeses peanut butter cereal.

jeni - thats all my freezer would be if I were single.

nay - I feel I've succeeded in this post if I've shed the light on just one person.

joo - I wear huge panties.

mk - we'd be in the mid 30's if there were shiny cereal.

christina - she seems to do that with pasta too. Then suddenly we won't have any ziti for a month straight.

EuroTrippen said...

I saw the title of this entry and automatically assumed it was about yesterday's VA shootings. It wasn't until I got to 'Caffeine Free Pepsi' that it dawned on me I might be wrong.

Yep, I'm a little slow on the uptake...

HappyKap said...

I've worked hard to break this habit myself. Dad always had at least 6 of everything, "just in case." (Who needs 8 Aim-n-flame;s?) I admit that I stockpile Tide, pasta, pretzels and cheese.

Lisa said...

Tim:

You and your wife must have gigantic medical bills from the heinous gaping wounds in your mouth from the sharp edges of the Reese's cereal.

I don't let my husband shop. The only things he buys are cans of tuna and whole wheat bread.

Chick said...

Why is this the problen of every couple I know?

If you have room for it...why now buy it & save money so that she can buy more shoes? (if they are on sale too...of course).

Paul said...

We have about 6 jumbo boxes of cereal because they were on sale. We will eat them though, so ultimately, it is saving us money.