Monday, January 08, 2007

Down and Out

I often brag about my immune system. I never get sick. I haven't thrown up sober in over 10 years. (Last time I threw up drunk? September 2005. On my honeymoon.) At 7am this morning I woke to take care of my sick daughter. I got dressed, then my immune system, much like my sophomore year Accounting Teacher, failed me. The River Seine flowed from my insides and into my toilet bowl. It was horrible. Throwing up blows. Luckily my mom was able to come over and help out. I spent about 6 hours in bed today and I can't wait to get back in bed. My immune system and I are going to have to have a long talk in the morning.

10 comments:

jootastic said...

That's possibly the grossest way to say that you have the hershey squirts...the diarrhea...peed out your butt...etcetera. But, I do hope you feel better!

ジェネヴィーヴ said...

aww i had the stomach flu this weekend so i can relate. muwahaha i got better faster, though!
jk, hope you feel better soon!

Leezer said...

Timophil:
Welcome to parent-hood. In 2001 the Seattle Mariners had a record-breaking season. We had behind home plate-tickets. It was five hours before the game. Georgia threw up and exactly four hours later I was throwing up. I couldn't even watch the game on t.v. Lesson learned. When your wee one throws up, you have exactly four hours of reprieve before you, as well, are barfing. No more, no less. (I hope you feel better soon, and remember the butt-paste works on grownups too.)

Beechball * said...

awwww, that's too bad - guess that means that Kim's next on the chopping block; best to plan ahead. I hope you're all feeling better soon and liek you said, I too can't rememeber the last time I was sick due to anything but drinking. drinking sure got me over my fear of puking through, and I had fun conquering that fear... I think I just spelt that wrong. oh well.. G'night and feel better! :P

Melissa said...

Barfing shits are the worse. Drink some green tea and sleep.

❉ pixie ❉ said...

What's all this talk about diarrhea? Did I miss something? I thought you were throwing up,not shitting profusely.

Anyway, I thought your post was full of lovely metaphors and similes despite the horrid subject matter.

Think Frustrated said...

That's like Seinfeld:

"I haven't thrown up since 1989!"

Too bad. I've been hospitalized with food poisoning twice. Imagine sitting on the toilet, and shitting out watery stuff, while holding a bucket in your hands and puking at the same time. Every time you throw up, you shit some more. That sucks. Count your blessings.

That said, Get better before this weekend. Lots of important football happening.

Conti said...

I'm sorry to hear about your Yak Attack, Tim. Let me know if there is anything I can do.

Oh great One said...

Aww. That really blows. Get it? Blows? Like chunks! I thought it was funny.

Funqi said...

Come on, isn't anybody going to make fun of the fact that his mommy came to take care of him (ok I know it was really to take care of the baby but still)?