Monday, August 14, 2006

Why I gave up saving lives

Two and a half years ago I was an avid blood donor. We have regular blood drives at work and I always gave. Then one foolish phlebotomist missed my vein twice. She finally found it, but she messed my arm up so bad I couldn’t lift it above my head for 3 days. I swore off giving blood for the rest of my life. About a year ago I was over my trauma and tried to give again. But, I had been in Punta Cana, so I wasn’t allowed because of the malaria risk. So, last Wednesday was my first chance to get back in the hero business. The guy found the vein on the first try, so I thought I was good to go. On Friday my arm started to bruise and today, 5 days later, it looks like a 64 box of Crayola threw up on my elbow.

An eight inch bruise for a little prick. Or a big prick depending on how much you dislike me.


Jazz said...

Ewww, that from a giving blood? WTF? That is not normal, somethings gotta be wrong. And why is it there instead on the inside of your elbow? Who gives blood from there? lol. Sorry for laughing. I know, it's not really funny. hee hee. Hope your bruise gets better real soon.

Oh great One said...

Holy cow! Why is it bruised there? When I get blood draws they take it from the crook of my arm so that is where I get a bruise (IF I get one.)

❉ pixie ❉ said...

Wow! That just adds to my case of why I don't like to give blood. The dumb-ass technicians can never find my vein and it always hurts. I'm with jazz on where the hell did that guy draw blood from? I'd be concerned if I were you.

Chuck said...

I give blood once a year just so I can rule out that I have aids. It's better than having to do it at my doctor's office...

Tim said...

chuck - yeah. It's a good way to find out if my wife is cheating on me with a druggie or a gay guy.

everyone else - they took the blood from the crook of my arm like normal. I have no idea why the bruising is on the underside of my elbow. The only thing I can think of is that I went to the pool after work and leisurely swam around. The pressure swimming puts on your elbow may have caused this bizarre bruising.

Softball Slut said...

Ick. When people ask you should tell them you were in a fight. Or your wife beat you up for backtalking. Or something

fuzzymuffin said...


Think Frustrated said...

Tim's Bruised Elbow
Arm like a Monet.
No good deed goes unpunished.
I just donate sperm.

Leezer said...

I'm with Chuck. I give blood to determine whether I have AIDS or am anemic. (really, don't send hate mail, I'm just kidding).


Give sperm or grow your hair for Locks o'Love. Maybe you could grow your toenails super long like those India Swamies and donate them to the toenail-less.

Seriously, though. Something is wrong with you or the vampires.

Lulu said...

Oh, that looks terrible. I wonder why it's on the underside of your arm.

Still, at least you're a hero and you get to wear a cape and shit. Right?

Jeni Angel said...


The last time I tried to give blood, they couldn't find the vein and on the third try the FUCKING BITCH moved the needle-whilst it was still in my arm-an got it into the vein.

However, I did not receive a freakish bruise such as yours.

ick. Give it up.

miss kendra said...

that looks familiar. i don't give blood either, as i tend to get giant blood blisters that prevent arm bending.

eventually they go away, leaving me with a gross bruise much like that one.

it happens anytime i am needled. i used to have blood taken once a month due to medication. that was fun.

Conti said...

I'd pay big money to drink your blood.

HappyKap said...

Man, caring is ugly.

angie said...

Nice gun(s). Do you work out?

Laurie said...

You have some issues there guy. But you are still damn funny so I put up with it. I'm good like that.

Tim said...

ss - good idea. I smacked my wife around with the inside of my elbow.

fm - yeesh

tf - I keep my sperm.

vof - locks of love is a sham. I'll go with the toenail thing.

lulu - yeah, and I'm pretty sure I get to make out with Kirsten Dunst or Kate Bosworth, or at least Margot Kidder.

jeni - Ouch! I'd a smacked the bitch.

mk - it makes that herione addiction difficult, doesn't it?

conti - you could drink my blood for free.

hk - woman caring is ugly too.

nagie - it's gun. I lift with only my left arm.

laurie - thanks for putting up with me.

inconspicuous attack toad said...


Melissa said...

I'm pretty sure those are the marks of a crack whore. I'm just sayin...

Anonymous said...

The Same thing happened to me. They did put the needle in the bend of my elbow but the bruise was on the side of my arm, Just like yours. It just keeps getting bigger but I figure it was just a bad nurse, I am going to try again.

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