Monday, April 24, 2006

Porn or Children's book?

Come Sally.
Come, Come!
Oh, Sally.
Come Come!
Come Sally, Come!
Oh Sally!
See Sally go!
Go Sally, go.
Go, go, go!
Sally said, "Oh, see. See Mother go."
"Come Dick! Come, Jane! Come and go!"
Jane said, "Oh, Dick! See Sally and Tim."
"Oh, Oh, oh! See baby Sally go! Go, dick, go!"
Sally said, "oh, Mother!"
"See dick fall down. See Jane fall down."
"Funny Funny Dick and Jane."


This is the exact wording of a book we got yesterday. The only thing I added was the exclamation points. How am I supposed to read that to my kid with a straight face?

14 comments:

❉ pixie ❉ said...

You won't be able to now. Neither will I next time I'm reading a Dick and Jane book. Ahhh parenting...

min said...

Burn that filth.

BTW, what is the title of that book?

Chuck said...

Damn, just reading that kinda turned me on a bit. That Sally sure can come...

Tim said...

pixie - we tried to read two books and couldn't get through them. The other had a character Big Nutbrown Hare. And everypage it had the character's name. We started laughing and had to put it down.

min - It's Dick and Jane Go and See. I can't wait till we get another Dick and Jane book. I heard they're getting into fetishes soon.

chuck - They may as well have said "gush sally gush."

The Other Half said...

what's even funnier is listening to your kid read it...over and over...and over...and over...my girl loves that book

❉ pixie ❉ said...

Big Nutbrown Hare? That's even funnier. I think the people that write these books do that kind of stuff on purpose to torment the parents.

Queen Of Pink said...

A ton of children's books can be taken the wrong way with a dirty mind. Unfortunately for my kids, they have had to listen to me snicker through a lot of their book. A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.

Oh great One said...

NICE! What was the name of that book?

M said...

filthy...and yet strangely arousing.

Melissa said...

Why don't you start buying quality stuff to read to the baby, like Us Weekly and Star?

Conti said...

Sally is such a cocktease.

the belligerent intellectual said...

I think you really just need to accentuate the positive message in the text, that, basically, once the man reaches orgasm the act of love is over.

Tim said...

awaa - Truthfully, I can't friggen wait!

pixie - no doubt about it. I'd do the same thing.

qop - you have a dirty mind? no!

ogo - Dick and Jane Go and See

m - yeah, if they put different graphics in the book it would be a totally different story

mel - good suggestion. Baby Bore has to keep up with the Thetans!

conti - funny how sally comes over and over, yet dick only comes once

bi - yeah, and then the woman laughs at him

Paul said...

that's exactly why you should never read to kids. It's better if they learn that stuff on tv, it's more graphic.