since Titso has done about 95% of the planning for this wedding, she's making me write the Thank You letter that goes in the church program. I'm not usually too good at saying thank you to people, but I think what I came up with is pretty nice.
"We would like to thank all of you for joining us to celebrate our big day. Everyone that is here today has affected our lives in a positive way and we are very grateful for everything you’ve done to help us get to where we are today. Except those of you who we don’t even really know. And those of you who are actually dicks and didn’t do shit for us. We want to thank everyone for the buttload of cash you better have brought with you today. Tomorrow we plan on filling our bathtub and swimming in it all. We would also like to thank our parents for creating the two best-looking humans on the face of this earth. I can’t believe how lucky I am when I look at the beauty staring back at me, in my mirror. Although this whole small penis thing I got going is kinda bullshit. But anyway, this wedding cost a lot of fucking money and we want to thank our parents for all the help with that. So, everyone better eat all their food, take a piece of cake with you, and I better see at least 5 or 6 people in the hospital lying along side me with me with alcohol poising tomorrow."